States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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