That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Come share oat with me in your robe
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
