It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Of course I have a pirate flag
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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