why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
