im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
