talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
so let's talk penis.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Randomize
