We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
