either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
