all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
