They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
