i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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