i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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