I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
