Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize
