Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
