I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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