No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
