problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
