Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
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