she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
