That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize