i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
