Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Randomize
