It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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