Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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