VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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