the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
