Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
