just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Randomize
