He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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