Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
