you're like a bully in the Christmas story
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
