they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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