did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize