Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize