Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Randomize
