On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
