Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
