good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
