stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
