break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
