Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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