Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
