i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
