Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
