i just had sex bonerless
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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