He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
