what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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