went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
