Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize